From Anxiety to Fullness
One interesting thing about moving into Spirit Mind is that it doesn’t take any particular effort. In fact, it actually in some ways is the lack of effort which brings us into Spirit Mind.
So, for example, I’ve been practicing for a few months this wonderful thing of — when I wake up in the morning, my mind will still be kind of processing some Material Mind thoughts from the day before, or there might be a little sense of anxiety. Like lately, I’ve been having this feeling like I’m not ready for something.
So in my dreams, it could be like I’m about to give a presentation or have a class or something that I haven’t prepared for, and so there’s a sense that I’m not ready for it yet — a little anxiety. Or anything else that could be happening, you know — that’s kind of my Material Mind still sort of processing some thoughts or emotions or anxiety or fears and so on. And even though it’s small, it’s not like a big nightmare I’m having — even though it’s kind of small, I’ll notice when I wake up:
“Oh, this kind of energy is still processing.”
And rather than start my day kind of unconsciously with these thoughts — and kind of like, you know, turn my angle of my body and my soul and sort of head in that direction for the day — instead, I’ll just kind of relax in bed and do nothing.
And if you enjoy the Breath of Love meditation, you can play that one and do that if it helps. But for me at this point, just doing nothing and relaxing is enough.
So I’ll just kind of lay there. I’ll just notice my breath like we do in Breath of Love, and I’ll just be aware of the thoughts and feelings and emotions that are still processing.
I don’t try to do anything with them — so there’s no process or effort. There’s just a sense of being present with myself and knowing myself. And also knowing myself from a place of love — that it’s okay that I have thoughts or anxiety or regrets or whatever happens to be going on in Material Mind. That that’s a normal part of life, and it’s not a problem at all. It’s not something I have to change or that I have to deal with in any action-oriented way. It’s just part of life, and it’s no problem at all.
It’s great. It’s just like, you know, I have a body — and so the body sometimes will have something stiff, or maybe if I overdid something, I have some pain in the muscles, or maybe I caught a cold. You know, the body goes through these cycles. It’s not just in a perfect state of static health all the time — it’s always this dynamic, moving from one thing to the other, and growing, and learning, and healing, and so on.
So our Material Mind is like this. It’s just something to enjoy the ride of, rather than to try to wrangle into submission or control or something like this.
And so from this place of non-judgment and of self-love, I just notice what’s happening in my consciousness, and I just kind of wait in that space.
I’m not anticipating anything. I’m not trying for anything. I just kind of hang out with myself in this space of love.
And something remarkable happens.
Suddenly, even though I’m still feeling my Material Mind going through anxiety — this is what happened yesterday — going through this anxiety, this kind of idea that I’m not ready… that’s still happening.
But suddenly — boom — my consciousness expands into this amazing, huge, beautiful fullness where everything just feels really wonderful. And I feel completely alive and happy and complete.
And basically — if you’ve been through the Spirit Mind training — you know what I’m talking about.
My Material Mind has moved from being outside the space of Spirit Mind — where it kind of gets agitated and so on — and it’s moved into the space of Spirit Mind.
And yesterday I was really struck by the sense that I’m still observing my Material Mind having anxiety — specifically anxiety, this sense of “I’m not ready.”
That actually didn’t change.
What changed was: I went from the space of lack into the space of fullness. Where I’m experiencing that sense that I’m not ready while being inside Spirit Mind.
Completely different.
And I wanted to share it because a lot of times with personal growth, we think there’s something we need to do — or there are some steps we need to take, or even a meditation that we need to listen to.
And those things can definitely help — but they’re not strictly necessary.
You can just be present with yourself in the moment and be patient and come from love — and without doing anything, you’ll remember:
Ah… I’m Spirit Mind.
And my Material Mind is inside Spirit Mind.
Suddenly I feel full. I feel love. I feel hope. I feel peace.
And I’m putting words to it because this is, you know, a podcast. But really, it’s just a feeling.
It’s an amazing, bright, expansive feeling that comes about all of a sudden.
And at this point I know:
Ah, this is a great time to get up and start my day — because from this space, no matter what comes today, I’m going to continue feeling this fullness and this sense of love.
And that’s exactly what we’re going for with Spirit Mind living.
