The fastest way to lose your center is to try being like somebody else.
I was reminded of this this morning.
I sat down to meditate and was running my energy and going through the various energy tools like I teach in my Duality program, and it felt really good.
This is actually something that I rarely do anymore.
I used to practice this type of meditation daily.
At some point, it becomes kind of automatic.
Most of the tools are kind of working without consciously touching in, but I realized today how good it feels to touch in and use the tools for myself in a conscious way—to just go through and move my energy and go back to this familiar, comfortable space that I spent so many years developing.
I also realized that one of the reasons I got away from this daily practice, other than feeling like I didn’t need it as much, was that I met my wife Hisami, and I saw that she’s able to maintain this beautiful, natural, intuitive, tuned-in state without these tools.
So I noticed that this practice I’m familiar with and teach isn’t strictly necessary to get to the place I want to go, right?
Because I have an example—someone I’m with every day—who doesn’t use these tools and is experiencing beautiful, tuned-in awareness all the time.
So I thought, I’m going to just see if I can match her or be like her and get into that space from a different direction.
This is how I work—I adapt things, I try things on.
Sometimes I’ll try different belief systems for a while just to see how other people are thinking and gain some insight into that.
This is very natural for me, and I think we all do this to some extent.
We try to emulate or be like people that we admire.
And we can learn from that. It’s great.
But over time, it’s really important to come back to who we are and remember that we’re not the people we admire—and that’s okay—and that we have our own strengths and abilities.
It’s actually been a conversation Hisami and I have been having for quite some time, where we’re looking at how different we are.
Hisami really comes from a completely different space than most people.
We were joking the other day—it’s like she’s from a different planet or a different dimension of consciousness—and she’s kind of like an emissary here learning about people like me, who are more analytical and material-minded.
She’s learning about that, and I’m very different.
I’m very material-minded by nature, and obviously, through my practice, my teaching over the years, and through meeting Yay, I’ve become very interested in moving up in consciousness and experiencing a different, more peaceful state—not just being stuck in my highly active, analytical Material Mind.
But these are two very different paths, two very different people.
So for me to say something like, “The reason I don’t meditate anymore is because it just comes naturally to me all the time. I’m always in the state of meditation”—
I’ve actually heard myself say this before.
But even as I’m saying it, I realize that’s not really my story.
That’s Hisami’s story.
That’s my wife’s story.
She doesn’t practice meditation because she’s always in that state of centered meditation. That’s a natural state for her.
But when I take it on and try to be her in this way, or say the same things she’s saying, or do the same things she’s doing—and all of us do this, right? I know you’ve done it too. Some of you are probably doing it with me, right?—
Two things happen.
One, we do learn. We kind of match the energy of that person and learn from it.
But in some ways, we also invalidate who we are.
And over time, we can build up a little bit of distance between us and our true self, which is always going to cause some sort of dissonance in the long run.
So this is a good example for me today.
I’m tuning in. I’m meditating. I’m doing something that was natural for me—say, 15 years ago, I did this every day.
And I was reminded that even though our old practices may feel like they’re not strictly necessary anymore, and there are new ways we’ve learned to get those same things—
It doesn’t mean our old practices aren’t valuable.
And of course, I can see this in other people.
I see so many people benefiting from the energy tools that I teach and share.
But it’s true for me personally too.
Any old, really comfortable system that you’ve spent a lot of time with is okay to continue.
You don’t have to put it down when you pick up something new.
In fact, I’ve found that even though I like to deeply explore other people’s systems and information and learn more about the people I admire, I always feel best when I come back and say, “Okay, how do I take the comfortable things that I love doing and mix them together and make my own blend?”
How do I honor that the other person is different from me and give them credit for their messages, their energy, and their way of being—without invalidating myself?
It’s kind of this mixture between learning from them but not stealing from them, or learning from the people I admire but not losing myself in the process.
And I’ve said it many times—today is just another example—that yes, the quickest way to lose your own center is to try to be like somebody else.
Because ultimately, we all have beautiful, wonderful gifts to share, and we’re all here on different journeys.
Validating and living your journey from your own center, while still recognizing and incorporating and learning from the brilliance of others, is going to feel so powerful.
So I just wanted to share that today and encourage you to really be yourself—to reach inside and feel the things that bring you joy, and just be happy that you have them.
You don’t have to be changing all the time.
You don’t have to be growing all the time.
The real goal, I’d say, if there was one to being here, is to be present, to be ourselves, to be comfortable, and to enjoy our lives.
And this state of being doesn’t happen when we’re always comparing and trying to change and trying to be like other people.
So just slow it down a little bit today.
Have a nice breath, enjoy a practice that you love,
And celebrate that unique, wonderful, amazing person that you already are today.
